Me: Im shooting daggars out of my eyes. Dad: Im shooting farts out of my ass. (A little while ...

When digging in your parents closet to see what they got you for your birthday, never open the bo...

Do not play the Sims drunk. Everyone will die. #LFMF

Don't read the novel Pandemic, play the game Pandemic, and watch the movie Contagion in one sitti...